If the pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that community is critical. We need each other - even the casual acquaintances and so-called ‘weak ties’ like our favorite barista or bus driver (or for me, Kara at Lowe’s who now knows me by name after a particularly challenging patio-laying project).
And even more important are the close friends who we can call up when we need a belly-laugh or to share sorrow. Some of my absolute favorite times are around a campfire with friends (which I hope to be doing this very weekend!), or when my cheeks hurt from laughing so hard with my cousins.
But it’s also critical for us to have solitude - not sustained isolation as so many people have experienced over the last two years, that’s not good for us - but deliberate solitude. I also have favorite times when I am hiking alone, or even just sitting in my yard with a lunchtime sandwich.
I once encountered quite a large black bear at very close quarters while hiking alone. We surprised each other. And for a few moments, we communicated - as only one human and one bear can do. Non-verbally, but clearly. And then we each went about our business. It was a bit of magic I wouldn’t have had if I had been noisily hiking with others. (By the way, I don’t recommend encountering a bear that close - he just happened to hop up over a roadside barrier as I walked along a closed section of the Blue Ridge Parkway on a warm February day!)
For those of us who live with one other similar-sized human, or a couple of smaller, messier humans, even a small amount of solitude can be hard to design into our day.
But I’m going to challenge you to carve out some time this weekend for a moment to yourself. It’s not only good for you, but good for all those around you. We all need you centered, happy, grounded, full of perspective and energy, because it makes our lives better too!
Call us selfish. But wait….back to you.
What if you took that moment outside? Now that it’s getting a bit warmer, could you spend 30 minutes out on a walk, or in the woods, or in the yard - just wandering and noticing, feeling the sun, or hearing the rain on your umbrella, and listening to the birds?
Here’s a quote from a Time Magazine article, profiling Jane Goodall - one of my all-time heroes. Dr. Goodall has made a career and has changed the world by ‘connecting’ with the world around her and with the chimps and the jungle, and then by sharing those deep connections with us all. We wouldn’t have her teaching and wisdom were it not for her courage in being all alone in a big forest.
From a Time Magazine article by Ciara Nugent, September 30, 2021:
“But it was when she was alone, crawling through undergrowth or climbing mountains, that Goodall says she experienced a “spiritual connection” with the forest and its animals. “If you’re alone, you feel part of nature,” she says. “If you’re with one other person, even somebody you love, it’s two human beings in nature—and you can’t be lost in it.”
I’m reasonably certain the world would be a better place if we got a little lost in nature from time to time. Even if ‘nature’ is your yard, or a park, or a Sunday drive to the coast. It’s there that we can not only appreciate nature on its own terms (and reconnect with why a thriving natural world is so important), but also take a breath for ourselves, and reconnect with who we are when no-one’s watching. Which is also to be part of nature, as Jane says.